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Thursday, December 6, 2012

Tastes Just Like Chicken

Kristine P.A., of Los Angeles, CA. writes:

I dreamed I was at work - not my work, but some weird place that became a sushi restaurant. Ellen DeGeneres was there eating. She was super, super slouchy in her seat and her eyes were closed. I thought she had left, didn't see her, and reached right over her to clear her place. I grabbed something half eaten, I couldn't tell if it was tuna or chicken, and right then noticed she was still there. I started to apologize profusely and she just looked at me with her eyes half closed and wouldn't really say anything to me. She didn't really sit up properly either.  In RL, I've been told a few times that I sound like her. She didn't seem to notice. I thought "there goes any chances of being her voice double."

This is about your hidden desire to taste forbidden fruit. Your dream starts out supposedly at your work place, but it's not REALLY your workplace - a feeling we're all familiar with, when it comes to dreaming. The language you use to describe it is important: you describe the setting as a "weird place that became a sushi restaurant." In your dream state, you're in a place that you think is yours, but which is actually odd and foreign to you: new territory. A sushi restaurant. Need I say more? Your subconscious is fairly screaming "I WANT VAGINA BUT I'M NOT GETTING ANY!!!"

You say that you've been told you sound like Ellen Degeneres. Having spoken to you, I can confirm this. You write, also, about being her voice double. Your subconscious mind is presenting Ellen Degeneres, America's Lesbian Sweetheart, as your alternate identity. The theory of parallel universes describes how alternate realities exist. Anyone who's watched Star Trek can tell you that our alt universe doppelgangers are, in many ways, our polar opposites. But what happens when a person meets her own alt universe lesbian double and decides she'd like to trade lives? 

In your dream, you're not too proud to pick at Ellen Degeneres' leftovers. Eating a lesbian's leftover sushi? Does that even need an interpretation? Although you identify as a heterosexual woman, you're drawn to the ultimate Celesbian and you want the life that she has.

For her part, Dream Ellen is indifferent, bored, even sleepy around you. She doesn't even bother to sit up properly in your presence.  She doesn't see you in any way as a threat, and her very attitude makes you doubt yourself further.

This dream illustrates your burning desire to have sex with women,  the mountain of self-doubt that keeps you from actually lezzing out, and your fear that you've missed the boat.  My advice: don't try to bang Portia de Rossi and I don't think Ellen Degeneres will give you much trouble.

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