After a long hiatus, The Gay Agenda is back with two short-but-sweet dream interpretations. Send those dreams, and I'll do my best to tell you how gay you are.
Bernard B., of Boulder Colorado posts:
"Dreamt of chicken. Woke up to no chicken. :( "
Beebs, do you even know the difference between a chicken and a rooster? Your dream is clearly about COCK. Imagine your disappointment to wake up from such a blissful, homoerotic dream, and find yourself still stuck living a heterosexual lie! Dude, you are totally gay. My advice to you is: avoid Chick Fil A.
Tamara R.B.O., of Stratham, New Hampshire, writes:
"I dreamt of Mother Theresa and waiting tables at a college dining hall."
First off, Tamara, I suggest you buy a copy of "Lesbian Nuns: Breaking The Silence." You think priests are the only ones who take vows of chastity to avoid outing themselves as queer? Everyone knows that "nun" is, as often as not, Catholic for "lesbian." Your dream is a clarion call - a call to service. While Mother Theresa was called upon to take care of lepers and starving children, though, your calling is of a more carnal nature. A dream about a college dining hall? From a New England girl like you? Higher education means one thing, when you're north of Yonkers: LESBIANS.
Your dream indicates that you are not only gay, but a bottom in search of a top: like Mother Theresa, you yearn to serve, and serve humbly. Get yourself over to Northampton, and find yourself a butch top. Smith and Hampshire are teeming with them.
The Gay Agenda is back to raise funds for the relief effort in Puerto Rico. Have a dream you want me to interpret, with my very specific spin? Send $25 via Paypal to email@example.com, and then send the details of your dream in an email. Please include your name, as you'd like it to appear on the site when my very gay interpretation of your dream is posted. 100% of the proceeds will go to Hurricane Maria relief efforts in Puerto Rico. Prefer Venmo? You can send your donation that way, too. My Venmo username is Lana-Nieves.
Don't like Paypal OR Venmo, but still want to get in on this? Donate to the relief effort on your own and show me a receipt for a donation of $25 or more, and I'm down to interpret your dream. The only thing that matters to me is raising money for Puerto Rican relief.
THIS SITE HAS ALREADY RAISED AND DISTRIBUTED OVER $1600 FOR THE RELIEF EFFORT IN PUERTO RICO.