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Friday, November 9, 2012

Kids and Cocktails

Amber S.,  photographer from  NYC writes:

First dream: I dreamt I was taking a bunch of 18 year old kids I knew when they were like babies on a picnic and we debated whether they were old enough to have cocktails. We did, in the end, decide to have small gin cocktails. The picnic was in the abandoned house of an ex of mine.


The fact that you've dreamt about people in their infantile state signifies your desire to get back in touch with yourself in your purest form: not the person you've grown to become, but the person your were BORN to be. 
The debate about cocktails is also telling - it's you arguing with your inner child about whether or not you are ready to move forward and take that inner child into adulthood - a move from breast milk to hard liquor, if you will
You don't want to leave your baby self - your pure self - behind, because you know that's the real Amber and you're weighing up how to reconcile that with being an adult from whom the world has certain expectations. 
The entire event takes place in the home of an ex-lover so, again - this refers to you compartmentalizing your life (the baby Amber lives in this space, adult Amber lives in this space, this is the space I reserve for things having to do with romantic relationships...) and to your desire to stop doing this and live your life as more of a whole person, with all these parts of you integrated into daily living. Obviously, that it's the house of an ex lover also refers to The House Where Desire Lives. You're dreaming about being in your purest and most real state, in a house associated with sexuality and desire, and you're getting ready to drink gin. 
Did you know gin is made from the juniper berry, which is the female part of the juniper tree? 
This is a dream about your desire to finally face the fact that you're a lesbian. 

Second Dream:  I dreamed I tried to sell as scrap metal an item to gather up some cash and was bringing something that my mom (who made jewelry) made to these guys who had a scrapping stand that was really like the hotdog cart. This item that was really too big to be jewelry and it was like the size of a bookend and I knew it was silver and some other metal. They were trying to scam me and tell me that it wasn't silver and they're making up these strange names of metals which I kept writing down with a Chinese marker on a piece of butcher paper. I tried to take my thing back because they only wanted to give me nine dollars. 

That you're dealing with a material object passed down from your mother tells me that your dream is clearly about something you believe has great value...not monetary value, but something really close to your heart that you would never really want to get rid of. Also something connected to female energy, and who is the first female any girl feels an affinity for? Her mother. 
This important object - it's big, too big to be other words, it's not just ornamental. It has significance beyond what people see of it. TOO BIG TO IGNORE. It represents your sexuality. 
This dream and its components are you telling yourself that the fact you're clearly a lesbian can't just be shoved into your pocket and forgotten - it's big and you can't help seeing it and feeling it. Like a pair of bookends, it defines a space - a space inside of your soul! 
It's also precious - if its coming to you in the form of a gift from your mother isn't enough to show that, you've even given it the distinction of being made of precious metals, including silver, which is an important component in photography - something that I know is close to your heart. 
In your dream, you consider selling the object that represents your sexual identity, but are offered very little for it, and you know that you've allowed yourself to be shortchanged - by men in a HOT DOG CART, no less -  so you're trying to "take your thing back." Men have shortchanged you, and your true sexual leanings are obviously towards other women. You're a lesbian.

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