The Gay Agenda is back to raise funds for the relief effort in Puerto Rico. Have a dream you want me to interpret, with my very specific spin? Send $25 via Paypal to telpher@gmail.com, and then send the details of your dream in an email. Please include your name, as you'd like it to appear on the site when my very gay interpretation of your dream is posted. 100% of the proceeds will go to Hurricane Maria relief efforts in Puerto Rico. Prefer Venmo? You can send your donation that way, too. My Venmo username is Lana-Nieves.
Don't like Paypal OR Venmo, but still want to get in on this? Donate to the relief effort on your own and show me a receipt for a donation of $25 or more, and I'm down to interpret your dream. The only thing that matters to me is raising money for Puerto Rican relief.
THIS SITE HAS ALREADY RAISED AND DISTRIBUTED OVER $1,500 FOR THE RELIEF EFFORT IN PUERTO RICO.

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Does this come in a size 5?

Melissa B., currently of Middle America, writes:

Dear Gay Agenda,

I have a recurring theme in many of my dreams: I need a new outfit and there is a store I want to go to to buy it, but I can't access the store. I can't remember how to get there or it is closed or there is some other thing impeding my desire to shop. This store has super cute clothes and good prices. what does this mean?

As the saying goes, "clothes make the man." In this case, clothes make the woman. What we wear on the outside is often a window into what we are on the inside. Your dream is about your desire to dress up in a way that you find most pleasing, and which suits you in every way. You're tired of the old suit of clothes you've been wearing and you "need a new outfit." You can only do this by shopping at the right store - the one with the cute clothes and the good prices. This dream is about your subconscious need to do away with the tired, old suit of heterosexuality you've been wearing for so long: it's old and tattered and, let's be honest, it makes your ass look huge! You're ready for an outfit that reflects who your are and accentuates your lesbian attributes. Every time you try to get to the right store - the magical Sapphic shop, if you will - something gets in your way. What is this something, Melissa? I suspect it's the false persona you've created for the world - the persona of a "normal," heterosexual woman. That's not a clever ensemble, girl - it's a straitjacket, with a chastity belt built right in. You're a lesbian: start dressing like one.

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